What your weight is trying to tell you (and how to listen)
Weight gain is not always about calories.
Sometimes, it’s about protection.
Sometimes, it’s about belonging.
And almost always, it’s about something much deeper than what you see on the scale.
Today, I want to guide you through a perspective that goes beyond diets and fitness trackers. A way to understand your body’s language, so you can stop fighting it and start listening to it. Through Biodecoding, you’ll discover that weight gain is not the enemy — it’s a messenger. A wise, sometimes desperate, attempt from your body to keep you safe.
If you’ve struggled with your weight, judged your reflection, or felt like you were doing everything “right” only to gain more, this is for you.
The hidden biological intelligence behind weight gain
When we think of weight gain, we tend to see it as a failure of discipline or a sign of imbalance. But in Biodecoding, we see something radically different: an intelligent adaptation. Your body is always trying to protect you, even when its methods seem inconvenient or painful.
Let’s look at the three main biological functions that make weight gain a survival strategy:
1. Fat as a shield of protection
Imagine you were living thousands of years ago. A wild animal roars outside your cave, or a member of your tribe threatens to harm you. Your body’s first priority is not to look good — it’s to stay alive. One of its tools is to build a protective buffer.
Fat literally pads your organs and tissues, creating distance between you and a perceived threat.
In modern life, these threats don’t usually come from predators, but from emotional conflicts that feel overwhelming:
Feeling unsafe in your own home
Being bullied or criticised
Living in a constant state of vigilance and stress
Growing up in an unpredictable or hostile environment
Over time, your body interprets that extra weight as necessary armour. The pattern can become automatic, especially if these stressors started early in life.
Reflection:
When you think about your weight, does any part of you feel like it’s protecting you from something or someone?
2. Fat as an energy reserve for survival
Another function of fat is to store fuel. Our ancestors often faced periods of famine. When food was scarce, the body would slow down metabolism and store every extra calorie to survive the coming days.
The modern version of this ancient adaptation can look like:
Chronic dieting
Skipping meals
Living in financial insecurity
Feeling unsure about your future
Your nervous system can’t distinguish between actual famine and emotional scarcity. It just senses “we don’t have enough.” So it holds onto fat as insurance.
This is why restrictive diets often backfire: the more you restrict, the more your body clings to its reserves. You may have noticed that when you eat too little for extended periods, your weight loss plateaus or even reverses. Your body is simply doing what it’s evolved to do: keep you alive.
Reflection:
Do you often feel like you’re living in “survival mode”?
3. Fat as a strategy to be seen and acknowledged
Here’s a truth few people talk about: sometimes, our body grows to help us feel visible. In Biodecoding, this is called the biological conflict of invisibility or abandonment.
Imagine a child whose emotional needs were unmet. They learned that being small and quiet led to neglect or rejection. The body’s subconscious response might be: “If I’m bigger, they’ll notice me. If I take up more space, they can’t ignore me.”
This need to be seen can manifest later in life as weight gain that no diet seems to address.
It’s not that you’re weak or undisciplined — it’s that a younger part of you is still trying to be acknowledged.
Why understanding your body’s story changes everything
When you shift from judgment to curiosity, your entire relationship with your body changes.
Instead of asking,
“Why can’t I lose weight?”
you start asking,
“What is my body trying to do for me?”
This simple reframe opens the door to true healing. Because if your body is trying to protect you, fighting it only adds more conflict. You don’t need to fight. You need to listen.
The role of your nervous system
One of the most overlooked aspects of weight gain is the state of your nervous system.
If your body lives in a constant fight-or-flight response, it’s primed to store fat. This is not just an emotional issue — it’s a physiological cascade:
Chronic stress elevates cortisol.
High cortisol signals your body to store fat, especially around your abdomen.
Your metabolism slows to conserve energy.
This means you could be eating well and exercising but still gaining weight if your nervous system feels unsafe.
Key insight:
Safety is the prerequisite for sustainable weight release.
A gentle invitation: What if you don’t have to earn your worth by being smaller?
So many of us have internalised the idea that our worth is proportional to how little space we occupy. That thinner automatically means “better.”
But what if your body is wise enough to know that healing comes first? That before it can safely let go of weight, it needs to be sure you won’t abandon yourself again?
This is the deeper work of Biodecoding — learning to become a safe place for your own feelings and unmet needs.
How Biodecoding can help you heal from the inside out
In a Biodecoding process, we don’t focus on dieting or restriction. We focus on decoding your body’s language, so the biological conflict can be resolved.
Here’s how we do it:
Identify the timeline:
We explore when the weight started, what was happening in your life, and which emotions were present.Map the symbolic meaning:
We look at where the fat is stored and what that area symbolises emotionally.Release the root conflict:
Through gentle conversation and somatic awareness, we bring understanding to the original wound.Reprogram the response:
Your body learns that the threat has passed and it’s safe to let go.
This approach isn’t fast or superficial. But it’s deeply sustainable, because it works with your biology, not against it.
How to start your own decoding journey
Here are a few ways you can begin this path:
Book a free 30-minute discovery call
Let’s explore your story together and see if Biodecoding feels aligned.
Try Bach Flower Remedies
Gentle plant-based formulas can help soothe emotional patterns that trigger weight gain.
Download the Digital Self-Care Oracle
Daily reminders to honour your body’s wisdom and soften your inner dialogue.
Use Silent Subliminals for subconscious reprogramming
Listen daily to release the belief that you must carry extra weight to be safe or worthy.
What if your body is not the obstacle, but the guide?
The next time you feel frustration about your weight, remember:
You are not lazy.
You are not broken.
You are not failing.
You are living in a body doing its best to keep you safe in a world that often feels overwhelming. And that is a testament to your resilience.
When you start to decode your weight with compassion and curiosity, you create the conditions for change that isn’t forced but natural.
You don’t have to do it alone. I’d love to walk this path with you.
💛
María Emilia Soldavini
Biodecoding Practitioner & Life Coach
The Empowering Hive
You might also enjoy:
Master Stress E-book – A holistic guide to rebalance your mind and body
The Impact of Emotions on Health
